I’ve only one word for Pink -- wow.

She strolled on stage in a slinky white robe to perform ‘Glitter in the Air’ from her Funhouse album at the 2010 Grammy Awards. For those of you hovering over the mouse wondering whether or not to watch this video, let me aid in your decision making. Shortly into her performance Pink drops her robe to reveal a flesh coloured bodysuit, is hoisted into the air where she gives one of her trademark aerial acrobatics displays before getting very…..wet.

A chillingly expressionless mother catches her son masturbating in this 1970’s sex ed video. “It felt good didn’t it?” Shudder.

If you lived in South Korea and worked for the country’s health ministry then you’d be pretty pleased right now. The Ministry is turning off it’s lights and sending staff home early every third Wednesday. Why? To combat the country’s falling birthrate.

The Ministry is running a project whereby it turns off the lights and bundles staff out the door with a nudge nudge wink wink early every three weeks to “help staff get dedicated to childbirth and upbringing”. It should be noted that ‘early’ to the South Koreans is 7pm! No wonder they’ve baby making issues – they must be walking zombies!

The health ministry is dangling all sorts of carrots in front of employees to drive them to copulate including cash gifts and generous gift vouchers for staff who produce more than two babies! My boss gave me a Rolo today and babies were never discussed. Not surprising since in Ireland we’re on the brink of a baby boom with a birth rate of 17.2 per 1,000 population for the first six months of 2008 compared with 16.2 in 2007 when the EU average was just 10.6. Soon the Government will be doing a mass mail-out of condoms with our voting cards and turning off the hot water so it’s cold showers all round.

In contrast South Korea’s birthrate is one of the lowest in the world at 1.19 in 2008. They fear the population will begin to shrink within a decade causing economic and social problems.

Health Minister Jeon Jae-Hee told the Korea Times newspaper that increasing the country’s young population is “actually the most urgent and important issue the country is facing.”

I’m sure most Irish people would like to ‘county swap’. Ireland’s pressing issues = rising unemployment, erratic and miserable weather, banking crisis, recession depression. South Korea= The imminent need to have unprotected sex sanctioned by the government.

Today was one of those ‘pull your hair out and stuff it into that annoying persons throat just to shut them up‘ days. So in an attempt to zone out life, I hit the wibbly wobbly web in search of chewing gum for the mind and found a real gem.

No doubt aimed at the ‘more money than sense‘ and ‘clinically insane‘ market,  Regretsy is a haven for people who could not give up make and do after they reached adulthood. The site whose tagline is “Handmade? It looks like you made it with your feet” allows people to sell their handmade wares. A tasteless eBay if you will.

Having a quick look through the goods on offer caused me to completely forget the worries that those of us that reside in the real world must deal with. I pondered what the person who made this looked like and what their ‘day job’ was as they most definitely should not give it up to peddle their line of kitch soap:

The tag ‘bath and beauty’ clearly requires a stretch of the imagination. Other items on offer include:

Off with you to make your own crafts to peddle to the mentally challenged!

Check out this video from the crew over at The Onion: